My poem on the awards ceremony. Nothing that good. I just hadn't posted in awhile.
__________
I won the contest. So here I am.
Getting dressed in the bathroom.
In a cold church.
I can hear the people outside the door.
One of them mentions my poem.
I feel sick, but I do nothing.
Bile rising.
And the second they leave.
Down to the toilet.
My stomach clenching.
My lunch springs forth.
And so I sit,
on this dirty, cold floor.
I change my clothes again.
Good thing I brought my toothbrush.
I come out of the bathroom.
I pace around the building.
Anticipation. Terrified.
Finally it's time to start.
I find my way to my seat.
Surrounded,
by people who love me.
Yet I am not comforted.
I want nothing more than to run.
Run, and never look back.
The award ceremony starts.
First the young ones,
then continuing age by age.
The grade before me.
A girl cries, her father does not love her.
I feel for her, and I myself cry.
My friend has won also.
So I clap, and as he finishes reading
I stand, both in being proud,
and having to get in line for my grade.
Terror, I'm shaking.
Only one other person in my grade came.
She goes before me.
I feel the blood drain
as she finishes, and Shaking hands.
My name is called. I step forward.
So many people, sitting waiting.
They want genius,
all I can give them is who I am.
I start to read.
My fears shrink away.
Sadness wells up inside.
Recalling my lovers suicide.
Tears come, but I read on.
I look into their eyes.
Willing them to feel my pain.
Many do.
As I look at them, I see the tears come.
Choking on my own words,
I take a deep breath,
slowing down.
So I say the last words.
Few eyes are dry.
I shake hands.
Words of amazement offered.
Not given to anyone else.
I smile politely, not comprehending.
I go back to my seat.
Silent tears falling down my face.

For myself. This is a poem that I both love and hate.

I love the imagery.
&
I dislike alot of it.

What about you?

my child it amazes me how you can pour your feelings, thoughts, and soul out to us like that

Thank you dad.

I just write what comes. It's nothing special.

It is beautiful.
It felt like I was right there with.
Going through everything like you did.
I am used to your poems but still they still get to me.

Thanks hun.

I'm glad that my poems still effect you. I wouldn't want them to get boring.

Ick I remember that day

__________________
“I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.” J.R.R. Tolkien

"aller au diable. gehen in die Hölle. du-te la dracu."

I am strong, for I am a Corvinus. I will survive.

thats deep. its amazing ho wwe can recall such events and still feel the way we did that day, many years ago, in just an instant.

__________________
...What is Faith but Misplaced Hope?...


Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward.
Whoever cannot take care of himself without that law is both.
For a wounded man shall says to his assailant
"If I live, Iwill kill you, If I die you are Forgiven"
Such is the Rule of Honor.

"you can tell the same lie a thousand times, but it never gets any more true"

...Facilis Decensus Averno...

Thanks, Az.
I know exactly what you mean.

__________________
“I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.” J.R.R. Tolkien

"aller au diable. gehen in die Hölle. du-te la dracu."

I am strong, for I am a Corvinus. I will survive.