I wrote this whilst I was cooking this evening. Really, really bad. But i'd really like it if somebody could post some constructive criticism. [:


Cross my heart
and hope to die,
I never meant
to make you cry.
Take this string
and pot of glue,
and patch up what
I broke of you.
Wipe those tears off
one by one.
Paint on a smile,
what's done is done.
Slip the rope
around your neck.
Now you look
the perfect wreck.
Make a knot and
pull it tight.
Jump, my dear,
So long.
Goodnight.


The last two lines are from the song 'Helena' and you might recognise the first two from a child's rhyme.

Wow. I love it. It's very imaginative. I can see this scene. I really like the
"Take this string
and pot of glue,
and patch up what
I broke of you."

I can see that really well. It's also very well written.

Maybe you should write more "really bad" poems. tehehe

Hey!! I loved it! It's great!! And this is your first? WOW! yea write more bad poems

i thought it was well written

It was a very good first poem. I would like to read some more.

>___< really? i thought it was terrible. but, okay, haha. thanks for the encouragement.